You've Got A Friend In Me
by Tira Archer
Summary: How is it they are friends? A cute one-shot written for the MCI August Challenge.


**You've Got a Friend in Me**

"Star lover."

"Cave dweller."

"Prissy elf."

"Smelly dwarf."

"Tree hugger."

"Rock picker."

Aragorn snickered and traded a look with Arwen, who smiled gently. She was far too ladylike to say what she really thought, though Aragorn knew he would hear it from her later. Peering over the wall to the small garden niche below Aragorn spied the source of the voices, the most unlikely pair to ever grace Gondor, and possibly all Middle-earth.

Below him the elf and the dwarf were hewing away at some weeds, a task the Queen has set them to when she tired of their constant name-calling in front of Eldarion, who had decided it was great fun to copy them.

Hearing the noise of Aragorn's robe scraping rock, Legolas looked up and smiled. He knew to outsiders he and Gimli looked –and sounded– like complete enemies, but in fact it was the complete opposite. Aragorn knew and understood, and got amusement out of it. Legolas wondered how a person could have two such opposite friends and yet love them both so completely.

"You do know all and sundry can hear you?" Aragorn asked, amusement lacing his voice. "And there are a few who wish for it to cease."

"In other words, the Queen is there with you." Gimli grumped and whacked at more weeds. "And if we don't stop she'll put us to some other task when we finish here."

"Indeed." Arwen's face appeared next to Aragorn's. "I shall set you, Master Dwarf, to cleaning the privies inside and out."

"What about the elf?" Gimli's outrage was obvious.

"Oh, we have another job for him." Arwen's sweet voice replied, absolutely sinister despite all its beauty.

Legolas stared up at the king and queen with horror, not even wanting to find out what she held in store for him.

"Mister Perfect elf gets the easy job, I'm sure." Gimli muttered, forgetting Arwen's keen ears. If he had bothered to look he would have seen the frown mar her unblemished features.

Knowing he was doomed to whatever task awaited him, Legolas grinned. "Hole digger dwarf gets to clean the privies, inside and out."

"Not quite." Arwen said from above. "Yes, Gimli is to clean the outside of them, but you, oh sweet Legolas, brother of my heart, are to clean the insides."

Both elf and dwarf stared at the queen with a new appreciation for the merits of keeping one's mouth tightly shut.

_hours later_

"Now you really are a smelly dwarf."

"I am not the only one who smells." Gimli replied. "You, elf, smell like a dung pit."

"Of all things, I wonder why." Legolas said facetiously. He gestured to their surroundings.

"Well," Gimli began. "At least we know that the worst of Arwen's wrath is behind us. I don't think she could find anything much worse than this."

Regarding the dwarf with a long look, Legolas grinned. "So true. Let us then enjoy it, you axe loving, gem picking cave sitter."

"Tree hugging animal loving star gazer!"

"Short one!"

"Stuck up elf!"

"Ground dwelling dwarf!"

Passing by, the king shook his head at the insults flying from the general direction of the privies. Indeed, those two were the most unlikely of friends. He chuckled quietly to himself and kept going. If it made them happy, he did not see a problem with it.

A soft body hit his and little arms wrapped around his knees. Eldarion's little face looked up at him.

"Ada, are you a puny human who can barely shoot a bow?"

Gaping at his young son, Aragorn heard snickers and looked around, seeing Legolas and Gimli emerging.

"You two!"

"I think, lad, it's time we figured out just how fast we can reach the first level gates." Gimli said as Aragorn stalked towards them.

"I think you're right for once, dwarf." The two friends took off, their laughter flying in their wake.

"LEGOLAS!"

Eldarion turned to his mother, who had come up behind him. "Do you think, nana, that I should tell him that Uncle Dan said that?"

Arwen sighed. She would never understand the intricacies of the friendship between her husband and her brothers, or Legolas and Gimli. "No, love. He will find out soon enough." She said as two elves ran past her, childish laughter despite their years ringing out.

Elladan and Elrohir had decided to join the chase.


End file.
